Preparing for Sentencing: Letter Writing Guide for Family and Friends
This resource is adapted from Preparing for Sentencing: A Practical Guide for Defendants and Families.
When someone you love is facing sentencing, it can be hard to know what to say — or how to say it. This guide walks you through writing a letter that is honest, grounded, and genuinely helpful to the court.
A strong support letter:
Acknowledges the offense without minimizing it
Speaks to the person’s character in specific ways
Describes observed growth
Explains what support will look like after sentencing
Is concise and sincere
Avoid:
Attacking the victim
Blaming the system
Saying “they didn’t do it”
Overly emotional pleas without structure
Judges read hundreds of letters. Specificity stands out. “He is kind” is vague. “He has been attending therapy weekly for six months and calls me after each session to process what he’s learning” is concrete. Here are some other examples:
EXAMPLE 1
Vague:
“He’s a hard worker.”
Concrete:
“He worked two jobs for fifteen years to support our family. He would leave the house before any of us were awake and wouldn’t get home until late, but he’d always make time for us on the weekend. On Sundays, we’d go to church and afterward, he’d grill a big meal for our family. If any of our neighbors or congregation were going through hard times, he’d always invite them over to eat with us.”
EXAMPLE 2
Vague
“He wouldn’t hurt a fly.”
Concrete
“When he and his wife separated, he told me that even though he was hurt, he just wanted her to be happy, even if it was with someone else.”
EXAMPLE 3
Vague
“She’s a good mother.”
Concrete
“When her son wanted to join the soccer team, she supported him every way she could—working extra to pay for the team fees, making sure he had rides home from practice, and attending every game she could. He’s now attending college on a soccer scholarship.”
EXAMPLE 4
Vague
“He wants to put his life back together.”
Concrete
“He completed an inpatient rehab program and has been sober from drugs and alcohol since his arrest. I’ve been sober for 30 years and we talk often about what long-term sobriety looks like. He’s been learning how to identify triggers and have support systems in place to avoid relapse.”
Correct spelling and grammar are important. Judges are much more likely to read letters that are thoughtful, coherent, and articulate. Make sure to allow enough time before the sentencing for the attorney or mitigation specialist to read through the letters and contact you for clarification and permission to edit for spelling and grammar.
If English is not your first language and you don’t have anyone who can help translate, ask the attorney if there are resources to translate the letter into English. Many judges are bi-lingual or multi-lingual, but it should be assumed that the letter needs to be translated unless otherwise advised. Additionally – if you are planning to speak as a defendant or family member and need a court translator, talk to the attorney about this as soon as possible. Resources like that are available but often take time to secure scheduling.
